The Magic Touch | Sexual Gratification and Orgasm

I was in a nonsexual relationship for thirteen years. After that ended, I needed human touch to be reminded that I could still feel. Sex and physical pleasure helped me feel human again. —heterosexual woman, age 42

The skin is a woman’s largest sexual organ. It comprises an intricate system of nerves sensitive to changes in temperature, touch, and texture. The areas of the skin that are highly responsive to stimulation are often referred to as the “erogenous zones” because they lead to sexual arousal and pleasure. The most commonly cited erogenous zones are the neck, earlobes, most commonly cited erogenous zones are the neck, earlobes, mouth, lips, breasts and nipples, genitalia, buttocks, inner thighs, anus, backs of the knees, fingers, and toes. 

For some women, however, virtually any part of the body can be an erogenous zone. Regardless of which area of the body is involved, sexual pleasure can be intensified by the sensation of having one’s skin touched, whether from the slightest tickle and tease of a feather being brushed across a cheek, from the warmth and tenderness of sensing bare skin next to bare skin, or from the giving or getting of a massage:

Sex encompasses a lot of physical pleasure. Just the touching of one body to another is pleasurable, similar to getting a massage or receiving a hug. Kissing brings feelings of warmth and arousal, and genital contact and/or vaginal penetration brings upon orgasm. The combination of all of these factors makes sex more desirable to me than masturbation. —heterosexual woman, age 28

A woman’s nipples and areola, the colored area surrounding the nipple, are supplied with numerous nerve endings that make them especially sensitive to touch. When a woman’s breasts are stimulated through touch or massage, blood flows into the breast tissue and tiny muscle fibers enable the nipples to become erect.

This can cause the nipples and areola to become even more sensitive, and can add to a woman’s overall experience of sexual arousal:

Bumping into him again was perfect timing. . . . I was between regulars, so was he. . . . All I could imagine was the feel of his hands on my body, in my body . . . the stretch, the filling sensation as his cock entered me. . . . I asked him if he’d like to come over for a couple of hours . . . I could feel the moisture seeping into my panties . . . the clenching deep in my groin . . . the sensation of my nipples rubbing against my shirt. . . . Sex is for pleasure, he was a sure thing. It was as simple and as complex as “I want you.” —heterosexual woman, age 41

The sensitivity of breasts varies greatly between women. In a study conducted in the Meston Sexual Psychophysiology Lab, 82 percent of the college women surveyed said that nipple or breast stimulation either caused or increased their sexual arousal. In comparison, only a little over 50 percent of men find nipple stimulation sexually arousing. For 7 percent of the women (and the men), however, stimulation had the opposite effect—it decreased their sexual pleasure. Some women have nipples that become so sensitive during sexual arousal that even the slightest amount of touch can be unpleasant or painful. One factor is amount of touch can be unpleasant or painful. One factor is breast size: Smaller breasts are often more sensitive than larger ones. Breast sensitivity can also change over time in a woman as a result of hormonal changes during the menstrual cycle, pregnancy, and menopause. As a woman ages, her breast sensitivity tends to decline. That women more than men find nipple stimulation a sexual turn-on is likely related to the fact that starting at puberty, the sensitivity of all areas of a woman’s breast becomes significantly greater than that of a man’s.

Does it matter who the nipple simulator is? Not really. Although some women find breast stimulation sexually pleasurable only if it is done by their partners, most women who enjoy the sensations find stimulating their own breasts, or even having their breasts or nipples sprayed by water in the shower or brushed by clothing, to be highly pleasurable.